Social Survival by Hien Pham
on 06/17/2025 at 12:02 am- Comic »
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How do make friends as an adult? How do you break into a new social scene when you’re tongue-tied at the thought of mingling and rubbing shoulders? You’re not the only one! Social events and meet-ups are legitimately terrifying! But, I hope with these tips up your sleeves, you can find the courage to combat that darned social anxiety. Though, not all scenes are for everyone, and it might take a few tries before finding a group that works for you.
You could even try volunteering for social groups! Helping out immediately gives you an in with the organizers AND gives you a purpose at social events! Sometimes I feel lost when all I’m meant to do is to “participate”… but, walking around and handing out food or signing folks in at the door really helps to unlock my full social potential!
Matts Added Note: All June we’re pushing to get fresh support for the site in order to keep the lights on and plan out another year. Supporting us has never been more impactful and we’d be eternally grateful for any form of contribution. Help OJST survive 2025 and get yourself bonus comics!
If this webcomic has ever made you feel seen, taught you something new, or just made your week a little brighter, now is the time to support it. We’ve tried our best to make it easy to chip in this year by filling out our Patreon Shop with a bunch of options if you want to make a one-time contribution. For anything larger, just reach out to me by email: matthew daniel nolan on Gmail.
Want to help us promote this call-to-action? Feel free to post this 3 pager in-full ANYWHERE! You can also make use of the twitter card and Feature Image if you like!
↓ Comic Transcript
Today’s comic was written and drawn by Ian. It’s a full-color visual extravaganza. The whole comic takes part in a queer friendly LGBTQ space. There are many different types of people on display in this party setting, and I’ll try my best to cover them all! Hien has kindly given us pronouns and descriptions for each character, so I'll be using those predominantly.
Page 1Opens on our main protagonist wrestling with their hair and anxiously pulling at the collar of their shirt. They are Mac, a trans man with he/they pronouns. They have full, short brown hair above some short, scruffy facial hair. He wears round glasses and an off-white long-sleeve shirt, with a green knit sweater on top! I'll add that he has light skin and wears small heart earrings. He also has the appearance of being well-manicured and a little dressed up for today’s event!
By the third panel, we see a full shot of him at the party, sweating, and nervously standing in the corner while the room is a wash with different types of people. We have many different bodies and people attending, pride flags are floating, and delicious foods are laid out at a table. The different people are doing different things, from socializing to taking timeouts to grabbing nibbles.
Our protagonist, Mac, nervously says out loud
'I’ve never been to a queer social event before! I don’t know what to do! I need help!'
A tiny Hien adorned in flowery pink shorts and shirt 'poofs' into existence. Hien is a self-described balding, bearded, chubby Asian dude with brown skin and big glasses. I'll add that he has he/him pronouns and a cheer,y welcoming demeanor throughout!He winks as he says.
'Did I hear someone say, Hien?'
Hien takes Mac by his hands and looks up at him with big anime eyes.
'It’s OK! It’s natural to be nervous stepping into something new! I’ve been a part of several local queer groups for years now, and I still get so anxious.'
Hien continues waving his arm across the page in front of Mac, who looks on with sparkling excitement
Hien
'But, I’ve since developed my own social survival strategy! It might not help, but it can’t hurt! Let’s have a crack at it!'
Mac
'OK!'
Page 2
Opens on a blank panel with just the two characters standing in the middle of it, fairy godfather Hien floats next to Mac who scratches the back of his head.
Hien
'Who do you think we should talk to first?'
Mac
'… Who would you recommend?'
We are shown a view from behind Mac as they look across the party, fairy godfather Hein floats over from above. In front of Mac we see two party goers.
Steph is a femme lesbian, she/her with a deep burgundy long-sleeve sweater and orange pleated skirt. She has blond hair tied up in a ponytail. I'll add that she is light-skinned and adorned with several piercings and a necklace.
Next to them is an Unnamed "person hanging by themself", who is a tall non-binary they/them with a short black bob and mustache. They wear a flowy, translucent purple top over a black crop top and black jeans. I'll add that they have darker skin, and Bright pink nails and bracelets! I’ll call them Purple Ensemble for the benefit of the comic!
Hien
'In my experience, some conversations are easier to ease into than others. For starters, I’d suggest saying hi to the social event organizers, as well as folks hanging by themselves!'
The camera pans in close to Steph, who’s waving their hand and welcoming Mac, Next to them are two floating faces of Hien and Mac as they chit-chat
Mac
'Right! The people who make events happen to have the most stake in making sure everyone feels welcome!'
Hien
'Exactly! It’s practically in their role description to be friendly faces! They are also more likely to know a lot of folks at the social, and they can potentially make introductions!'
In the next panel, we see Purple Ensemble checking their phone, as Hien and Mac float around
Hien
'On the other hand, those hanging on their own are likely on a level playing field with you! Chances are they’re looking for some company, but haven’t made moves yet.'
Mac
'Maybe they’re just as nervous as I am… Something we can bond over, perhaps?'
Page 3Fairy godfather, Hien scoots and pushes Mac towards Steph, who happily smiles, blushes, and waves.
Hien
'Go on!'
Mac
'Hi!… It’s my first time here! I don’t know anyone… Would you mind if I joined you?'
Steph
'Not at all!'
The pair shake hands and make their introductions
Mac
'I'm, Mac! Like mac & cheese, except I’m lactose intolerant?'
Steph
'Haha! I’m Steph. It’s lovely to meet you!'
Mac quickly turns around to talk to the little Hein on his shoulderMac'Hien!!! What do I do past the initial nicecities!?'
Hien
'This very social event is the immediate thing you have in common with everyone here! Let’s start with that!'
For the rest of this page, we see small vignettes of Mac introducing themselves to different people at the party as Hien's face floats around and gives us some nice narration, it seems like Mac is doing great and saying hi to everybody around.
Mac
'How did you get involved with the scene?'
Hien
'This opens the floor for personal stories and connections with your shed community!'
Mac
'How was your first time going to something like this?'
Hien
'Where are they anxious? How did they overcome those hurdles? Can they relate to how you feel right now?'
Mac
'Are you a part of other group groups?'
Hien
'Discovered other areas of interest, and talking points! Plus, you can even follow up with the two previous questions!'
Page 4
We see two panels of Mac talking and then seeming a little distant from the group conversation, as more participants arrive! An unnamed bearded person joining is a trans man, he/him with a full brown beard and curly hair. He wears a rolled-up blue long-sleeved shirt with suspenders and tan pants. In addition, we have another unnamed beanie-clad person, who is a bisexual she/her with long and full curly black hair. She wears a sage green beanie, a red shawl with orange details over a black shirt and pants.
In the third panel, Mac points in the opposite direction and backs away, while saying to the group,
'I’m getting a little overwhelmed, I think I’ll go sit down for a bit.'
Purple Ensemble
'Oh, OK! Take care! Catch you around!'
Fair godfather Hien appears next to Mac, who is now sitting down, looking a little exhausted. Hien is very excited!
Hien
'That was a masterful disengage! I’m so proud of you! I’m quite partial to "I’m going to go walk around myself." '
Mac
'Ha ha! I hope that wasn’t rude, was it?'
The two take a pause, and Hien fills the panel with his thoughts
'Not at all. Things at these socials can be quite abrupt.
Sentences start but never finish, and folks bounce between groups. No harm, no foul.'
Hien floats up in front of Mac with a big grin
Hien'You’re doing great! You know that?'
Mac
'Really? I can’t tell at all.'
Mac put their head in their hand as they talk to Hien a bit more about his personal experiences
Mac
'What was it like for you? Your first big queer social?'
Hien melts a little as he replies
'Oh, it was a mess…'
Page 5
This panel is just Hien looking down, feeling a little thoughtful, a little sad, and a little retrospective all at once.
Hien
'I put way too much pressure on myself and everyone I met. Every interaction was impossibly high stakes. When I didn’t immediately meet the love of my life, it took three months before I came back on the scene.'
This next panel focuses on the room again and the people attending. They’re all flirting and laughing and socializing, as Hien continues to narrate.
'But, making friends as an adult isn’t like that. It’s about showing up. Again and again.'
We see more folks interacting at the party. Purple Ensemble is showing their phone to Bennie excitedly.
Hien
'Each time with a new piece of yourself to offer, and a willingness to hold someone else’s truth.'
In this next panel, we’re back with Mac as Hien floats next to him. Mac has his arms crossed in a more confident demeanor.
Mac
'You know… That doesn’t sound too scary. I think I can survive that.'
Hien
'Yeah? Hell, yeah!'
Mac twirls their hand in the air, and Hien floats with sparkles and excitement at seeing this newfound confidence in his ward.
Mac
'I was actually thinking of asking for Steph's social handles to keep in touch.'
Hien
'That’s a great idea!'
Mac
'Someone had a Pokémon tattoo I wanted to ask about too!'
The comic ends with our pair, clicking their heels and jumping into the distance
Hien'What initiative! I’m proud of you!'
Mac
'Shall we?'
And with that, the comic ends. It was written and drawn by the incredible Hien Pham, who can be found at https://hienpham.artstation.com/ in addition to his work here on Oh Joy Sex Toy! Today's was transcribed by Matthew Nolan on 6/16/25 using voice capture on his phone, which loves to make typos of names, so apologies for any errors! Just a reminder here that this month is OJST's big pledge drive month, and that we're basing all of our future plans on the support we can drum up this month! If you'd like to read more comic transcriptions like these, and have a budget for it, there is no better time to support us; https://www.patreon.com/OhJoySexToy
Page 1Opens on our main protagonist wrestling with their hair and anxiously pulling at the collar of their shirt. They are Mac, a trans man with he/they pronouns. They have full, short brown hair above some short, scruffy facial hair. He wears round glasses and an off-white long-sleeve shirt, with a green knit sweater on top! I'll add that he has light skin and wears small heart earrings. He also has the appearance of being well-manicured and a little dressed up for today’s event!
By the third panel, we see a full shot of him at the party, sweating, and nervously standing in the corner while the room is a wash with different types of people. We have many different bodies and people attending, pride flags are floating, and delicious foods are laid out at a table. The different people are doing different things, from socializing to taking timeouts to grabbing nibbles.
Our protagonist, Mac, nervously says out loud
'I’ve never been to a queer social event before! I don’t know what to do! I need help!'
A tiny Hien adorned in flowery pink shorts and shirt 'poofs' into existence. Hien is a self-described balding, bearded, chubby Asian dude with brown skin and big glasses. I'll add that he has he/him pronouns and a cheer,y welcoming demeanor throughout!He winks as he says.
'Did I hear someone say, Hien?'
Hien takes Mac by his hands and looks up at him with big anime eyes.
'It’s OK! It’s natural to be nervous stepping into something new! I’ve been a part of several local queer groups for years now, and I still get so anxious.'
Hien continues waving his arm across the page in front of Mac, who looks on with sparkling excitement
Hien
'But, I’ve since developed my own social survival strategy! It might not help, but it can’t hurt! Let’s have a crack at it!'
Mac
'OK!'
Page 2
Opens on a blank panel with just the two characters standing in the middle of it, fairy godfather Hien floats next to Mac who scratches the back of his head.
Hien
'Who do you think we should talk to first?'
Mac
'… Who would you recommend?'
We are shown a view from behind Mac as they look across the party, fairy godfather Hein floats over from above. In front of Mac we see two party goers.
Steph is a femme lesbian, she/her with a deep burgundy long-sleeve sweater and orange pleated skirt. She has blond hair tied up in a ponytail. I'll add that she is light-skinned and adorned with several piercings and a necklace.
Next to them is an Unnamed "person hanging by themself", who is a tall non-binary they/them with a short black bob and mustache. They wear a flowy, translucent purple top over a black crop top and black jeans. I'll add that they have darker skin, and Bright pink nails and bracelets! I’ll call them Purple Ensemble for the benefit of the comic!
Hien
'In my experience, some conversations are easier to ease into than others. For starters, I’d suggest saying hi to the social event organizers, as well as folks hanging by themselves!'
The camera pans in close to Steph, who’s waving their hand and welcoming Mac, Next to them are two floating faces of Hien and Mac as they chit-chat
Mac
'Right! The people who make events happen to have the most stake in making sure everyone feels welcome!'
Hien
'Exactly! It’s practically in their role description to be friendly faces! They are also more likely to know a lot of folks at the social, and they can potentially make introductions!'
In the next panel, we see Purple Ensemble checking their phone, as Hien and Mac float around
Hien
'On the other hand, those hanging on their own are likely on a level playing field with you! Chances are they’re looking for some company, but haven’t made moves yet.'
Mac
'Maybe they’re just as nervous as I am… Something we can bond over, perhaps?'
Page 3Fairy godfather, Hien scoots and pushes Mac towards Steph, who happily smiles, blushes, and waves.
Hien
'Go on!'
Mac
'Hi!… It’s my first time here! I don’t know anyone… Would you mind if I joined you?'
Steph
'Not at all!'
The pair shake hands and make their introductions
Mac
'I'm, Mac! Like mac & cheese, except I’m lactose intolerant?'
Steph
'Haha! I’m Steph. It’s lovely to meet you!'
Mac quickly turns around to talk to the little Hein on his shoulderMac'Hien!!! What do I do past the initial nicecities!?'
Hien
'This very social event is the immediate thing you have in common with everyone here! Let’s start with that!'
For the rest of this page, we see small vignettes of Mac introducing themselves to different people at the party as Hien's face floats around and gives us some nice narration, it seems like Mac is doing great and saying hi to everybody around.
Mac
'How did you get involved with the scene?'
Hien
'This opens the floor for personal stories and connections with your shed community!'
Mac
'How was your first time going to something like this?'
Hien
'Where are they anxious? How did they overcome those hurdles? Can they relate to how you feel right now?'
Mac
'Are you a part of other group groups?'
Hien
'Discovered other areas of interest, and talking points! Plus, you can even follow up with the two previous questions!'
Page 4
We see two panels of Mac talking and then seeming a little distant from the group conversation, as more participants arrive! An unnamed bearded person joining is a trans man, he/him with a full brown beard and curly hair. He wears a rolled-up blue long-sleeved shirt with suspenders and tan pants. In addition, we have another unnamed beanie-clad person, who is a bisexual she/her with long and full curly black hair. She wears a sage green beanie, a red shawl with orange details over a black shirt and pants.
In the third panel, Mac points in the opposite direction and backs away, while saying to the group,
'I’m getting a little overwhelmed, I think I’ll go sit down for a bit.'
Purple Ensemble
'Oh, OK! Take care! Catch you around!'
Fair godfather Hien appears next to Mac, who is now sitting down, looking a little exhausted. Hien is very excited!
Hien
'That was a masterful disengage! I’m so proud of you! I’m quite partial to "I’m going to go walk around myself." '
Mac
'Ha ha! I hope that wasn’t rude, was it?'
The two take a pause, and Hien fills the panel with his thoughts
'Not at all. Things at these socials can be quite abrupt.
Sentences start but never finish, and folks bounce between groups. No harm, no foul.'
Hien floats up in front of Mac with a big grin
Hien'You’re doing great! You know that?'
Mac
'Really? I can’t tell at all.'
Mac put their head in their hand as they talk to Hien a bit more about his personal experiences
Mac
'What was it like for you? Your first big queer social?'
Hien melts a little as he replies
'Oh, it was a mess…'
Page 5
This panel is just Hien looking down, feeling a little thoughtful, a little sad, and a little retrospective all at once.
Hien
'I put way too much pressure on myself and everyone I met. Every interaction was impossibly high stakes. When I didn’t immediately meet the love of my life, it took three months before I came back on the scene.'
This next panel focuses on the room again and the people attending. They’re all flirting and laughing and socializing, as Hien continues to narrate.
'But, making friends as an adult isn’t like that. It’s about showing up. Again and again.'
We see more folks interacting at the party. Purple Ensemble is showing their phone to Bennie excitedly.
Hien
'Each time with a new piece of yourself to offer, and a willingness to hold someone else’s truth.'
In this next panel, we’re back with Mac as Hien floats next to him. Mac has his arms crossed in a more confident demeanor.
Mac
'You know… That doesn’t sound too scary. I think I can survive that.'
Hien
'Yeah? Hell, yeah!'
Mac twirls their hand in the air, and Hien floats with sparkles and excitement at seeing this newfound confidence in his ward.
Mac
'I was actually thinking of asking for Steph's social handles to keep in touch.'
Hien
'That’s a great idea!'
Mac
'Someone had a Pokémon tattoo I wanted to ask about too!'
The comic ends with our pair, clicking their heels and jumping into the distance
Hien'What initiative! I’m proud of you!'
Mac
'Shall we?'
And with that, the comic ends. It was written and drawn by the incredible Hien Pham, who can be found at https://hienpham.artstation.com/ in addition to his work here on Oh Joy Sex Toy! Today's was transcribed by Matthew Nolan on 6/16/25 using voice capture on his phone, which loves to make typos of names, so apologies for any errors! Just a reminder here that this month is OJST's big pledge drive month, and that we're basing all of our future plans on the support we can drum up this month! If you'd like to read more comic transcriptions like these, and have a budget for it, there is no better time to support us; https://www.patreon.com/OhJoySexToy
