Telling a new partner that you’ve got an STI can feel like jumping off a cliff- believe me, I know it firsthand!
Here are some of the STI resources I cited in the comic, plus a few more helpful articles:
• CDC: Sexually Transmitted Infections Prevalence, Incidence, and Cost Estimates in the United States
• American Sexual Health Association “Herpes: Fast Facts”
• When, Where, and Why: Telling Your Partner You Have an STI
• When, Where and Why: Telling Your Sexual Partners You Have a Long-Term STI
Interested to learn a little more about those dreaded STIs? OJST has published a buuuuuunch of comics about them! Check it out:
• STI Mega Hit List
• Getting tested (From all the way back in 2017, so the advice might be a little dated – we’re working on a new one!)
• Hien’s awesome recent comic on PrEP
• Herpes
• HPV
• And here is our Education & Health section!
Come join us and stay up-to-date:
Bluesky • Mastodon • Pillowfort
(you can also follow For Free (like so) on Patreon)
And the others that we’d rather avoid, but still post to for now:
Twitter • Instagram • Facebook
Always looking to get more Reddit exposure too! Feel free to post work from our updated comics catalogue.
↓ Comic Transcript
Erika Moen draws in a cartoony, bouncy style with simple lines and no backgrounds. She uses a color palette of dusty yellows, pale oranges, red-pink, teal, yellow, black, and white.
Two women in their late 20s-mid 30s are talking excitedly with each other.
"Alright, so Saturday at 6?" Janet asks Bea, looking excited. She has short, scruffy red-pink hair with longer bangs that are swept to the side and held in place with a small barrette. She has a dusty peach-orange skin tone, a trim build, and wears a black t-shirt with an unbuttoned plaid long-sleeved shirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. Her muted orange pants cuffs are rolled up just above her black sneakers. A wallet chain hangs from her right pocket.
"Yup, it's a date!" Bea replies coyly, giving Janet a flirty eye. "I can't wait!" Her hair is braided into tight cornrows, her skin tone is also the same dusty peach-orange as Janet's, and she has a huskier, strong build. She wears a dark red-pink T-shirt over a second white T-shirt, along with her muted orange jeans.
In a euphoric daze, Janet walks away. Her eyes are swirls and her mouth is curled into a big, goofy grin while little hearts emanate around her head.
"Ohmigod, was that your crush?" Asks Erika as she rushes to meet up with Janet. Erika is a curvy 40-something white woman with a muffin top and tattoos on her arms. She has a poof of bangs while the rest of her head is shorn. She wears a black tank top, red-pink cuffed jean shorts, and her red-pink socks rise up higher than her black boots.
Still in a daze with her eyes swirling, Janet replies, "She... she asked me out."
"Yeah, man!" Erika cheers, giving the thumbs up. "Congrats! Haha, about time one of you actually made a move."
Suddenly, Janet's entire demeanor changes. She looks like a deer caught in headlights as she says, "Oh no." Turning on her heel to head back in the direction of Bea, Janet says over her shoulder, "Hold on, I'm gunna tell her I can't do it."
A giant "???" appears over Erika's head and she asks in confusion, "What's the problem?"
Full-on panicking, Janet asks, "What if she wants to kiss? What if she wants to do more? I CAN'T. I need to cancel now before she finds out and runs screaming for the hills."
"Finds out what?" Asks Erika.
"...Finds out I have a-" Janet begins to say, before she is interrupted by an enormous teal blob that lands on her back, forcing her to double over. Yellow and teal germ-like scribbles float around and in it, along with the words, "Sexually Transmitted Infection", which are written to look like they're infected and melting.
Page 2
Back in reality without the STI blob, Erika casually asks, "Oh, an STI? Is that all?"
"Uh, yes?" Asks Janet, confused and a little offended. "That's a HUGE deal!" Now melodramatically holding the back of her hand to her forehead, she uses her other hand to wipe away her tears as she confesses, "I'm afraid nobody will every want to be with me when they find out. I should just stop dating now!"
"Hey, I know it can feel isolating to have an STI," Erika says reassuringly. "but you definitely don't have to become a hermit because of it. You're hardly alone!"
Narration: Did you know that roughly 1 out of 5 people in the USA have an STI?*
*As of 2018. CDC, "Sexually Transmitted Infections Prevalence, Incidence, and Cost Estimates in the United States"
Five generic people silhouettes are lined up. The center one is colored teal, while the remaining four are orange.
"That's about 68 million people! And not all of them even know it." Erika chirps.
In her angst, Janet is transported to a dark room where she is illuminated by a teal spotlight. Her posture is full of shame as she retorts, "Augh, Erika, you don't get it! You've never had to tell someone that you have... you have..."
Back in in the well-lit present, Erika interrupts, "...Dude, I've told potential partners that I have herpes."
"You have herpes?!" Janet exclaims, aghast.
"Have we seriously never talked about this?" Asks Erika, with an expression of disbelief.
"You TOLD people you have herpes..." Asks Janet, looking completely unnerved and shocked. "...and they STILL wanted to do stuff with you?"
"Yeah!" Erika replies cheerfully. "Well, I mean, one person did turn me down when I disclosed. But in general, you just take extra precautions together, is all!"
Spinning out, Janet asks, "How do you even tell somebody? What do you say??? When do you tell?"
Page 3
Reclining on an enormous hour glass with the sand actively flowing from the top bauble to the bottom, Erika explains, "Well, the sooner you tell, the better. You want to give people time to decide without pressure, and maybe do some research on it first. Ideally, that means telling them well before you're in a situation where you're gunna be swappin' fluids."
Narration: Some dating/hook-up apps even let you list your STI status right there in your profile!
A phone shows a dating profile, which lists the information:
"Online
5'5" 27 years old.
Sexual Health:
HIV: Negative
Herpes: Positive
HPV: Negative
Last Tested: 6/25/2025
Narration: Or you can write it in your bio.
Looking determined, Janet pulls out her phone, announcing, "Alright. I'm gunna text her." while Erika gives an enthusiastic double thumbs-up in the background.
Janet sits on the ground, hunched over, and with a worried expression she frantically begins typing in a teal-colored text window, "I am so, so, so sorry but I have to confess something AWFUL to you. I understand if you never want to look at me aga-"
Before she can finish typing, Erika snatches Janet's phone away with a "H-okay, let's, uh, let's think about a different approach here."
Narration: The way you disclose sets the tone of how your would-be partner absorbs that information.
Janet tilts her head back, distraught, as a melty teal word balloon bubbles sickly out of her mouth. Unfriendly symbols hang in the balloon, signifying "danger" and "stop" and "no".
Looking worried, Erika cautiously proceeds with, "I'm sorry you're feeling ashamed and self-hate-y, but when you disclose with that language, you're priming them to react with fear and disgust."
Now Erika presents Janet with an enormous gift box with a giant bow on top and the words "INFO" written on the side, while explaining, "What you want to do is be informative and encourage their curiosity."
"Huh?" Asks Janet, utterly confused.
Page 4
Erika and Janet peek over the curled-down edge of the next page of this comic, which is titled "How to Disclose"
"Here's the kind of things I've said before:" Erika says, indicating towards all the talking Erikas on the next page.
The Erika on the next page looks friendly as she asks, "Hey, do you ever get cold sores? 'Cause I do!"
Title: Explain what it is.
The same Erika continues, "So yeah, I've got Herpes. They're on the most common STIs out there but most people don't even know they have it because they're asymptomatic.*"
Caption: *American Sexual Health Association, "Herpes: Fast Facts"
Title: Explain how it affects you.
Pointing at her mouth and another hand pointing downwards, Erika admits with an awkward smile, "It creates blisters on the area having an episode. As 'luck' would have it, I picked up the oral herpes variety (HSV-1) on both my upstairs and my downstairs. Fortunately, I haven't had any outbreaks in a couple years, and I only ever had two outbreaks on my downstairs about a decade ago with nothing since."
Title: Explain treatment.
Gesturing at a collection of floating pills with one hand and holding a pill container in the other, she explains, "When I do feel a flare-up coming on, I have an antiviral prescription to help suppress it and, of course, I abstain from any intimate contact then."
Title: Explain risk of transmission.
"It's most contagious during an outbreak," Erika continues. "but there's always a chance of transmission during normal times if we fool around."
Title: Encourage the to ask questions and give them space to digest this info.
Holding her hands up in the "slow down" position, she calmly goes on to say, "Listen you don't need to make any decisions right now. Take your time, do your own research, and reach out if you have any follow-up questions for me. Thanks for talking to me about this!"
Janet looks back contemplatively at all the previous Erikas, agreeing, "Ok, this is helpful. It's just... stating facts."
Page 5
"So should I tell her over text or face to face?" Asks Janet. "Somewhere private or in public?"
"Where do you feel the most confident? The safest? The most secure?" Erika prompts her. "In case things get awkward or worse," She says, making a sudden dash to a door and leaving a cartoon speed puff behind her. "it's better to disclose in a place where you can exit quickly and easily."
Narration: Ideally, your potential partner reactions compassionately, regardless of whether they want to continue with you or not.
"Thank you so much for telling me!" Smiles a hypothetical pink-orange skinned man with a black beard and short buzzcut that fades down the side of his head. "Could you tell me more about it? What effects does it have? How do you treat it? How does it get transmitted? What prevents transmission? I need some time to think about this and research it before I make any decisions."
Narration: Some people understand that all sex comes with risks and are willing to do what they can to reduce them.
An orange-skinned woman with long, wavy black hair holds up a condom as she says, "I feel safer having protected sex with someone who KNOWS they have an STI so we can reduce the chances of transmission, rather than any sex with somebody who doesn't know their status."
"And, of course," Erika explains. "people are entitled to reject anyone for any reason, whether it's STI-related -"
A man with short, fluffy black hair and orange skin interrupts, looking apologetically at Erika. A poster leans against his legs, the image obscured. "I'm actually immunocompromised and can't risk exposure." He says. In the next instant, he picks up his Magic Mike MMXXL movie poster and storms off, looking down his nose towards Erika as he says, "Also, I don't think we're compatible anyway since you don't like my favorite movie."
Looking annoyed, Erika finishes her original sentence, saying, "- or you don't like their favorite movie."
[EDITOR'S NOTE: Erika has never seen Magic Mike MMXXL and has no opinions on it. This movie reference was included as a nod to an OJST editor who did stop seeing a new guy because he did not care for said movie]
Page 6
"Listen," Erika says while leading a very dejected-looking Janet in front of a teal panel that is full portraits of different kinds of people with + and - marks floating over their heads. "it always sucks to get rejected, no matter the reason. But when it's because of your status, it can feel extra rough. Society has a lot of shame around sex and STIs that are hard to escape, despite how common they are!"
Back into a yellow-toned panel, Erika says, "Fortunately, we live in The Future where most STIs are either curable* -"
Caption: *like syphilis, trichomoniasis, gonorrhea, and chlamydia.
With determination, Janet kicks an oversize cartoon dead germ away, while Erika slams down the lid on a pill container that is full of angry, floating germs.
"- or manageable with treatment.**" Concludes Erika.
Caption: **like hepatitis B, herpes, HIV, and HPV.
Turning to face Janet, Erika tells her, "You are so much more than your status. You are a full, complex human being! You are lovable. You are fuckable."
"Yeah?" Asks Janet hopefully.
"Yeah." Erika affirms, putting a hand on her shoulder.
"Hang on," Janet says, pulling out her phone and walking away. "I've got a call to make..." Then giving a big thumbs up over her shoulder to Erika, she says into her phone, "Hey, I'm really looking forward to this Saturday! I actually have something I wanted to bring up with you..."
Far in the background, Erika gives an enthusiastic double thumbs-up to Janet.
Transcribed by Erika Moen on March 9, 2026.
Two women in their late 20s-mid 30s are talking excitedly with each other.
"Alright, so Saturday at 6?" Janet asks Bea, looking excited. She has short, scruffy red-pink hair with longer bangs that are swept to the side and held in place with a small barrette. She has a dusty peach-orange skin tone, a trim build, and wears a black t-shirt with an unbuttoned plaid long-sleeved shirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. Her muted orange pants cuffs are rolled up just above her black sneakers. A wallet chain hangs from her right pocket.
"Yup, it's a date!" Bea replies coyly, giving Janet a flirty eye. "I can't wait!" Her hair is braided into tight cornrows, her skin tone is also the same dusty peach-orange as Janet's, and she has a huskier, strong build. She wears a dark red-pink T-shirt over a second white T-shirt, along with her muted orange jeans.
In a euphoric daze, Janet walks away. Her eyes are swirls and her mouth is curled into a big, goofy grin while little hearts emanate around her head.
"Ohmigod, was that your crush?" Asks Erika as she rushes to meet up with Janet. Erika is a curvy 40-something white woman with a muffin top and tattoos on her arms. She has a poof of bangs while the rest of her head is shorn. She wears a black tank top, red-pink cuffed jean shorts, and her red-pink socks rise up higher than her black boots.
Still in a daze with her eyes swirling, Janet replies, "She... she asked me out."
"Yeah, man!" Erika cheers, giving the thumbs up. "Congrats! Haha, about time one of you actually made a move."
Suddenly, Janet's entire demeanor changes. She looks like a deer caught in headlights as she says, "Oh no." Turning on her heel to head back in the direction of Bea, Janet says over her shoulder, "Hold on, I'm gunna tell her I can't do it."
A giant "???" appears over Erika's head and she asks in confusion, "What's the problem?"
Full-on panicking, Janet asks, "What if she wants to kiss? What if she wants to do more? I CAN'T. I need to cancel now before she finds out and runs screaming for the hills."
"Finds out what?" Asks Erika.
"...Finds out I have a-" Janet begins to say, before she is interrupted by an enormous teal blob that lands on her back, forcing her to double over. Yellow and teal germ-like scribbles float around and in it, along with the words, "Sexually Transmitted Infection", which are written to look like they're infected and melting.
Page 2
Back in reality without the STI blob, Erika casually asks, "Oh, an STI? Is that all?"
"Uh, yes?" Asks Janet, confused and a little offended. "That's a HUGE deal!" Now melodramatically holding the back of her hand to her forehead, she uses her other hand to wipe away her tears as she confesses, "I'm afraid nobody will every want to be with me when they find out. I should just stop dating now!"
"Hey, I know it can feel isolating to have an STI," Erika says reassuringly. "but you definitely don't have to become a hermit because of it. You're hardly alone!"
Narration: Did you know that roughly 1 out of 5 people in the USA have an STI?*
*As of 2018. CDC, "Sexually Transmitted Infections Prevalence, Incidence, and Cost Estimates in the United States"
Five generic people silhouettes are lined up. The center one is colored teal, while the remaining four are orange.
"That's about 68 million people! And not all of them even know it." Erika chirps.
In her angst, Janet is transported to a dark room where she is illuminated by a teal spotlight. Her posture is full of shame as she retorts, "Augh, Erika, you don't get it! You've never had to tell someone that you have... you have..."
Back in in the well-lit present, Erika interrupts, "...Dude, I've told potential partners that I have herpes."
"You have herpes?!" Janet exclaims, aghast.
"Have we seriously never talked about this?" Asks Erika, with an expression of disbelief.
"You TOLD people you have herpes..." Asks Janet, looking completely unnerved and shocked. "...and they STILL wanted to do stuff with you?"
"Yeah!" Erika replies cheerfully. "Well, I mean, one person did turn me down when I disclosed. But in general, you just take extra precautions together, is all!"
Spinning out, Janet asks, "How do you even tell somebody? What do you say??? When do you tell?"
Page 3
Reclining on an enormous hour glass with the sand actively flowing from the top bauble to the bottom, Erika explains, "Well, the sooner you tell, the better. You want to give people time to decide without pressure, and maybe do some research on it first. Ideally, that means telling them well before you're in a situation where you're gunna be swappin' fluids."
Narration: Some dating/hook-up apps even let you list your STI status right there in your profile!
A phone shows a dating profile, which lists the information:
"Online
5'5" 27 years old.
Sexual Health:
HIV: Negative
Herpes: Positive
HPV: Negative
Last Tested: 6/25/2025
Narration: Or you can write it in your bio.
Looking determined, Janet pulls out her phone, announcing, "Alright. I'm gunna text her." while Erika gives an enthusiastic double thumbs-up in the background.
Janet sits on the ground, hunched over, and with a worried expression she frantically begins typing in a teal-colored text window, "I am so, so, so sorry but I have to confess something AWFUL to you. I understand if you never want to look at me aga-"
Before she can finish typing, Erika snatches Janet's phone away with a "H-okay, let's, uh, let's think about a different approach here."
Narration: The way you disclose sets the tone of how your would-be partner absorbs that information.
Janet tilts her head back, distraught, as a melty teal word balloon bubbles sickly out of her mouth. Unfriendly symbols hang in the balloon, signifying "danger" and "stop" and "no".
Looking worried, Erika cautiously proceeds with, "I'm sorry you're feeling ashamed and self-hate-y, but when you disclose with that language, you're priming them to react with fear and disgust."
Now Erika presents Janet with an enormous gift box with a giant bow on top and the words "INFO" written on the side, while explaining, "What you want to do is be informative and encourage their curiosity."
"Huh?" Asks Janet, utterly confused.
Page 4
Erika and Janet peek over the curled-down edge of the next page of this comic, which is titled "How to Disclose"
"Here's the kind of things I've said before:" Erika says, indicating towards all the talking Erikas on the next page.
The Erika on the next page looks friendly as she asks, "Hey, do you ever get cold sores? 'Cause I do!"
Title: Explain what it is.
The same Erika continues, "So yeah, I've got Herpes. They're on the most common STIs out there but most people don't even know they have it because they're asymptomatic.*"
Caption: *American Sexual Health Association, "Herpes: Fast Facts"
Title: Explain how it affects you.
Pointing at her mouth and another hand pointing downwards, Erika admits with an awkward smile, "It creates blisters on the area having an episode. As 'luck' would have it, I picked up the oral herpes variety (HSV-1) on both my upstairs and my downstairs. Fortunately, I haven't had any outbreaks in a couple years, and I only ever had two outbreaks on my downstairs about a decade ago with nothing since."
Title: Explain treatment.
Gesturing at a collection of floating pills with one hand and holding a pill container in the other, she explains, "When I do feel a flare-up coming on, I have an antiviral prescription to help suppress it and, of course, I abstain from any intimate contact then."
Title: Explain risk of transmission.
"It's most contagious during an outbreak," Erika continues. "but there's always a chance of transmission during normal times if we fool around."
Title: Encourage the to ask questions and give them space to digest this info.
Holding her hands up in the "slow down" position, she calmly goes on to say, "Listen you don't need to make any decisions right now. Take your time, do your own research, and reach out if you have any follow-up questions for me. Thanks for talking to me about this!"
Janet looks back contemplatively at all the previous Erikas, agreeing, "Ok, this is helpful. It's just... stating facts."
Page 5
"So should I tell her over text or face to face?" Asks Janet. "Somewhere private or in public?"
"Where do you feel the most confident? The safest? The most secure?" Erika prompts her. "In case things get awkward or worse," She says, making a sudden dash to a door and leaving a cartoon speed puff behind her. "it's better to disclose in a place where you can exit quickly and easily."
Narration: Ideally, your potential partner reactions compassionately, regardless of whether they want to continue with you or not.
"Thank you so much for telling me!" Smiles a hypothetical pink-orange skinned man with a black beard and short buzzcut that fades down the side of his head. "Could you tell me more about it? What effects does it have? How do you treat it? How does it get transmitted? What prevents transmission? I need some time to think about this and research it before I make any decisions."
Narration: Some people understand that all sex comes with risks and are willing to do what they can to reduce them.
An orange-skinned woman with long, wavy black hair holds up a condom as she says, "I feel safer having protected sex with someone who KNOWS they have an STI so we can reduce the chances of transmission, rather than any sex with somebody who doesn't know their status."
"And, of course," Erika explains. "people are entitled to reject anyone for any reason, whether it's STI-related -"
A man with short, fluffy black hair and orange skin interrupts, looking apologetically at Erika. A poster leans against his legs, the image obscured. "I'm actually immunocompromised and can't risk exposure." He says. In the next instant, he picks up his Magic Mike MMXXL movie poster and storms off, looking down his nose towards Erika as he says, "Also, I don't think we're compatible anyway since you don't like my favorite movie."
Looking annoyed, Erika finishes her original sentence, saying, "- or you don't like their favorite movie."
[EDITOR'S NOTE: Erika has never seen Magic Mike MMXXL and has no opinions on it. This movie reference was included as a nod to an OJST editor who did stop seeing a new guy because he did not care for said movie]
Page 6
"Listen," Erika says while leading a very dejected-looking Janet in front of a teal panel that is full portraits of different kinds of people with + and - marks floating over their heads. "it always sucks to get rejected, no matter the reason. But when it's because of your status, it can feel extra rough. Society has a lot of shame around sex and STIs that are hard to escape, despite how common they are!"
Back into a yellow-toned panel, Erika says, "Fortunately, we live in The Future where most STIs are either curable* -"
Caption: *like syphilis, trichomoniasis, gonorrhea, and chlamydia.
With determination, Janet kicks an oversize cartoon dead germ away, while Erika slams down the lid on a pill container that is full of angry, floating germs.
"- or manageable with treatment.**" Concludes Erika.
Caption: **like hepatitis B, herpes, HIV, and HPV.
Turning to face Janet, Erika tells her, "You are so much more than your status. You are a full, complex human being! You are lovable. You are fuckable."
"Yeah?" Asks Janet hopefully.
"Yeah." Erika affirms, putting a hand on her shoulder.
"Hang on," Janet says, pulling out her phone and walking away. "I've got a call to make..." Then giving a big thumbs up over her shoulder to Erika, she says into her phone, "Hey, I'm really looking forward to this Saturday! I actually have something I wanted to bring up with you..."
Far in the background, Erika gives an enthusiastic double thumbs-up to Janet.
Transcribed by Erika Moen on March 9, 2026.
