While Wikipedia explains the mechanics of premature ejaculation, this article by Cory Silverberg really gets to the heart of the issue and I encourage everyone to give it a read (regardless of what kinda junk you have and how you feel about it!): Why I Love Premature Ejaculation This passage especially resonated with me:
… [Premature ejaculation is] an opportunity to do something most of us never do; question why we have sex in the first place.
After all, the idea of premature ejaculation presupposes that there is a clear end goal, and that you’re getting there too soon. It also presupposes that extending sex is an obvious goal of sex. If you’re ejaculating before you want to, or before your partner wants to, the first thing you ought to do is ask yourself, what is it that I want to extend? Is the sex I’m having good enough to want to make it last longer? Am I coming quickly because really, there’s not much to wait around for? And do I want the goal I set for sex to be one that requires a stopwatch to evaluate?
What if all you wanted from a sexual encounter was to feel good? If ejaculating prematurely feels bad then you’ve got a good reason to learn to control ejaculation. If it doesn’t, then maybe what’s required is a conversation with your sexual partner about what they want, and how you can make sure you both get what you want, how you want it.
The second reason I love premature ejaculation is that it provides an interesting counter narrative to the traditional story we tell ourselves about male sexuality. Male sexuality is simple, we say. …
–Cory Silverberg, Why I Love Premature Ejaculation
(Emphasis my own)
As always, Scarleteen* delivers on the good, practical advice on how to understand and deal with a hair-trigger cock in the articles I come way too soon and I just can’t deal! and A problem with “premature” ejaculation…maybe isn’t premature ejaculation.
*Support Scarleteen’s comprehensive, inclusive sex education with a small (or large) donation!
See you next week! (If not sooner ;)