You know you want this

THE ANAL SAFETY SNAILS T-SHIRT.

Yes! YOU asked for it (Well, multiple people did, maybe not you specifically. BUT YOU STILL GET TO REAP THE REWARDS.), and we have listened! This tasteful design tells the world to go slow and gives a clandestine wink to any other Oh Joy, Sex Toy fans out there that you enjoy the same reading material.
Anal Safety Snails
(If this is your introduction to the Anal Safety Snails, now is the perfect opportunity to go back through our archives and acquaint yourself with our unofficial mascot: from their introduction in our Fleshlight review, to their second manifestation in our coverage of nJoy Pure Plugs, to their most recent starring role in our strip on Butt Sex)

Though they encourage you to go slow, you definitely shouldn’t wait to

pre-order your very own Anal Safety Snails shirt!